ANOTHER Moody Monday

January 17, 2011
The past two weeks of the Delayed Intensification phase have brought on fabulous Tuesdays thru Sundays (great mood other than steroid induced mood swings here and there AND a healthy and plentiful appetite thanks to steroids), but WHOOOOOOAAHHHH IS ME to Mondays. It obviously stems from TIRED and STEROIDS but WOW! It is not like I am prepping the kid for a spinal and yet he is tough to get out bed and get going. We didn't have to avoid meals/drinks for 13 hours. He was allowed to eat breakfast and drink all he wanted. We just had to apply the magic cream on his port and walk out the door. He acts just like anyone of us trying to get a move on on a workday Monday. Slow going and crabapple city! He truly wants to stay in bed and I sure as hell don't blame him. Makes me wonder if at the young age of 2 this is all getting old for him?

Once we get there is he is okay but then little things that usually don't upset him do. Like accessing his port-past two weeks he has been whiney about it, while in past months he insists on helping. And he hasn't been as playful with Aerum (child life specialitst extraordinaire). He is content with a book in my lap, a nap or today it was copying Triston w the Leapster or Leapfrog.

Today G wanted to be like T but also on the opposite side of the room of him. True love-hate relations today. You know how when we are crabby and over the top frustrated and we take it out on our significant others? That is how Grayson handles it all. He REALLY does take it out on T. T could do nothing wrong but walk past him and G whacks him. His own personal punching bag. Thank goodness we have raised T to tell us instead of retaliate. It means I hear, "Mom, he did it again!!" a million times a day but whatever.

And then to top off our visit today he threw the biggest tantrum when I was finally able to say we could go home. HUH? PMS x 100 I tell you! I give him what he wants bc all he did was whine he wanted to sleep in my bed and he fights me to leave. A full on tantrum w spaghetti arms and body making it ever so difficult to get him dressed. You know the kind! Even Triston told him, "With attitude like that I don't think you are going to the bakery with us!" He was right. G did not get a cookie and T did. I was the mom walking the halls with the screaming boy in the stroller. Thank goodness I brought it to carry all our crap bc there was no way I was going to carry him out of there and get beat up along the way.

Little did my audience know my boy had an excuse. The worst and yet most acceptable excuse to act the way he did. Cancer. I didn't care. I didn't care what people thought. They don't ride this rollercoaster with me. They didn't wake this morning hoping this cold doesn't get the best of them. They didn't have to use up their day off doing chemo crap. Bringing their 5 yr old along in order to take advantage of every minute of the day to spend time with him while continuing to remind him of what his little bro goes thru every Monday. These gentle reminders to support him thru this as well. Leaving their happy 6 mos old at home w the hopes he would stay on schedule as he fights his cold. They may not have had the horribly emotional weekend like I. Believe me-I would have preferred to be at a museum with my kiddos like most parents do on days like these. Gosh, I miss museums so much. Yeah, I could take T but it wouldn't be like old times w/out G. I miss his awe as he reacted to both the exhibits and Triston's expressions. So innocent and so uplifting to look to his bro for reassurance.

So, needless to say it was a pretty blah day. There was good news-great counts for the most part. No need for a blood tranfusion which is always good considering the time it sucks out of a day. But I packed for it just in case. Left directions with Mamac for the baby just in case. Just in case we weren't home until after 9 pm.

Today's counts:
WBC-1.71 last week it was 6.38
Hgb-9.3 last week it was 9.5
Platelets 345 last week it was 647
ANC-580 last week it was 5, 790 (check out that plummet!)

His counts are def jumping all over the place during this phase.
Cheat sheet:
we want Hgb over 8 or else a transfusion
platelets over 20
ANC (neutrophils) over 1, 000 otherwise he is considered neutropenic and has little helping him fight off infections

So most numbers held well but we really need to watch that ANC this week. I have all of us wearing masks this week. My prayer for the week...no fever. Let him fight off this cold and fussy-acting asthma ( observed since Saturday) w/out any hiccups.

But as much as I am complaining I am grateful for :
good moods
smiles
laughter
early bedtimes a few times last week
fantastic appetite of cicken, steak, potatoes, noodles, and broccoli
consumption of something other than milk-root beer floats
two unexpected play dates for either of the boys w healthy kiddos
hugs
cuddles
egg nog (my drink of choice this past week)
but something tells me wine will be this week's choice

So, readers-that is the start to weeek 24. We finished our day w Mcds lunch, naps (which made all the difference in the world for Grayson's mood, as he runs around goofing off w trains right now), Mythbusters and Wild Kratts and an early dinner. We survived an irritable Monday and hope the week gets a little less irritable. At least for the boys. I have way too many report cards and 4 mos of paperwork to catch up on to include myself in that happy boat for now. But someday...a
blissful cruise awaits me. I guarantee it. You hear that, honey! I will even settle for a Disney cruise at this point!